It’s that time again, and though I said in my last IWSG that I was determined to finish my first draft by the end of the year, I have not accomplished much in it. I am not on track to finish, at the rate I had intended, so I will really have to up my game to get it done on time.
The thing is, I didn’t honestly expect myself to be on track one month into my venture. I’m truly lacking some perseverance quality or something. Because of this, my biggest writing fear is that I will never finish a novel worth publishing, that I will not be able to accomplish the thing I knew when I first picked up a book as a toddler that I needed to do with my life. After watching John Green’s latest VlogBrothers video yesterday, in which he claimed to not know what to do with his life, I have been unable to decide if I am relieved or unnerved. If someone who has accomplished great things and achieved much of his life goals is still afraid that they aren’t doing enough, then what is it I need to do?
I must say, I am actually more relieved than unnerved by John Green’s words. I’m certain that, even if I achieve something even remotely close to his books’ popularity, I too would still feel like I haven’t achieved yet my life goal. It’s just the way humans work. It’s the way the world works. We don’t finish our big project and then be happy the rest of our life. Goals come ago, happiness comes and goes, and achieving something doesn’t mean you’re finished.
Let’s hope this knowledge helps me complete this draft by the end of the year. I know I will feel replete for a while when I’m done, but that feeling will fade, and soon I’ll have others opportunities to write and bring happiness to others—and myself.